Random Thoughts of a Distorted Mind

This journey we call life endlessly fascinates me. Most curious to me is how we adapt and grow as we move along on our individual paths. It's amazing to me how many lives we live in our considerably short life spans.

Just imagine, for example, how many people you have met in your life. Then imagine how many of those people you really didn't pay much attention to, how many you just simply adored, how many you actually cared for and how many you took the time to know and love. Also imagine how any minuscule tweak in your life could have altered the states of those relationships entirely.

And the funny part, to me, is that the people and the situations that influence us also change throughout time, for no reason, and at any moment our lives can completely flip upside down without anyone so much as batting an eyelash. A person whom you once considered to be your best friend can easily become a stranger and someone you swore to loathe eternally can very easily become a lifetime friend.

But what leads me to all of this is really far more internal. I've been thinking a lot about my life and all the people I have known and loved and hated and how I've changed and grown along along my own path. I guess to summarize my point; a person who met me 5 years ago and a person who met me now would know two similar, but very different people. Isn't that utterly bizarre?

Our priorities and our meaning change just like the seasons. So when I consider my journey and I pinpoint the people that align with each particular phase of my life, I can't help but smile knowing the vast array of people who have come and maybe gone out of my life, but who, no matter how small or insignificant have all permanently left little imprints on the woman I have become.

It's awe-inspiring. Really.

I have also taken note of the fact that I haven't posted a recipe in quite some time. The Boyfriend and I have limited ourselves to mostly barbecuing (his mom bought us a shiny, new grill) or, for my part, concocting new omelettes. I figured I'd share our latest favorite.

Buffalo Chicken Omelette

Ingredients: (serving size: 2)

2 Tablespoons Butter

4 Eggs

Salt (to taste)

Pepper (to taste)

2 slices of Cheese (I like Provolone, the Boyfriend prefers Swiss)

1 Small Can Chicken (similar to tuna, but NOT)

1 Small Can Sliced Mushrooms

Mayonnaise (to taste)

Frank's Redhot Sauce (to taste)

Ken's Chunky Blue Cheese Dressing (to taste)

You Will Need:

One Small-Medium Size Frying Pan

2 Medium Size Bowl

Whisk

A Fabulous Spatula

1.) In a Medium Size Bowl, whisk together the Eggs, Salt and Pepper.

2.) In the other Medium Size Bowl, combine the Chicken with the Mayonnaise.

3.) Heat one tablespoon butter in the Frying Pan over Medium-Low Heat. (on my stove I heat it to 4 on a scale of 4-6)

4.) Pour a half of the Egg Mixture into the frying pan and place the slice of Cheese on the right half. Let it cook for about 2 minutes, making sure that the top remains a bit eggy.

5.) After the 2 minutes, begin to add the filling ingredients in the following order: the Mayo Chicken, Mushrooms (to preference), Redhot Sauce (to preference), and last, but not least, the Blue Cheese Dressing. (as shown below)

6.) Carefully flip the left side over so it will be on top of the right side. Allow to simmer for about 2 more minutes or until no egg is running out of the edges.

7.) Flip the omelette over and cook the other side for an additional two minutes.

8.) Enjoy! And remember, a messy omelette is a delicious omelette.

I Need You, Please Come Home

For those of you who don't know, I currently drive a two door Ford Explorer which I "won" in a very fair trade with my Papa. He took my Hyundai, I took the four wheel drive. The problem is that I've become so accustomed to driving my tank that I honestly can't drive another car without catastrophe. I know you're thinking "an Explorer isn't a tank". But it IS, you see, it's MY tank and I need it! So of course, what happens? It breaks... and now I'm going to have to fork over $800 to recover my tank from this hostage situation called "repairs"! Geek me out, say what?

In the meantime I'm driving the Boyfriend's old school Thunderbird which, by the way, is covered in Jimmy Buffet stickers. But more than the parrot head issues, his bright green sports car makes me feel like I should be in a White Snake video. Yesterday I even felt pretty sexy driving around in it with my sunglasses on, my hair whipping in the wind and Metallica blasting on 94.1. That is, of course, until I tried to GET OUT of the very short sports car, tripped over myself, slammed the door into my side/foot/arm and got my hair caught in the door.

My rantings in the Saladworks parking lot may have scarred innocent children. Tall women should stay away from low to the ground sports cars. But in all seriousness thank goodness for coffee. It is the defining factor that maintains my role as a member of the working class instead of becoming a member of the sleep-until-noon class or the I'm-so-embarrassed-I'm-going-home-and-hiding-under-the-covers class. Good thing for me I'm not prone to embarrassment anymore due to years of overexposure to the feeling.

On a positive note: My sister bought me these outrageously purple flats for my birthday in December. I'm in love. Thanks Shawnie! xoxo.

I also made a meatloaf the other night during the "snowicane" and wanted to share my recipe with you. I love meatloaf. I love meatloaf. I love meatloaf. Ok, I think you get the point. This recipe is fast, easy and delicious. It also makes the Boyfriend extremely happy.

Meatloaf

Ingredients:

1 Pound Meatloaf Mix (can use Ground Beef or Ground Turkey, or a combination of the two)

1 Egg

1/4 Cup Yellow Onion (finely chopped)

1/4 Cup Plain Bread Crumbs

1/2 Can Cream of Mushroom Soup

1 Garlic Clove (finely chopped)

Worcestershire Sauce (To Taste)

Salt (To Taste)

Pepper (To Taste)

You will need:

Medium Size Bowl (for mixing)

One Loaf Pan (as seen in the second photo below)

Additionally:

Don't forget the ketchup! In my Mama's house we always had Meatloaf with mashed potatoes and peas. If you ask me, this is still the best combination.

Directions:

1.) Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and pour yourself a glass of wine.

2.) Combine all ingredients in a Medium Size Bowl. (as seen below)

3.) Mash the ingredients all together. I use my hands. You can use a spoon if that concept freaks you out.

4.) Pour now combined mixture into a Loaf Pan and level it out with your hands (or a spoon, wimp). You'll want to shape it to fit into the corners of the pan. (as seen below)


5.) Place the Meatloaf in the oven on the medium rack for about 30 minutes. The time depends entirely on the oven. You'll want your meatloaf to be golden brown on top with no sign of pink. Another thing to note is whether the edges seems crispy and the middle doesn't look like mush. Just sayin...

6.) Relax, you have a half an hour. Drink some wine. Watch TV. Call your girlfriend and tell her how awesome you are. Girls love that.

7.) Once the Meatloaf is ready, pull it out of the oven, let it cool and grab your ketchup.

8.) Enjoy!

This is my idea of what Meatloaf dinner looks like:

Please Allow Me To Introduce You

to my very dear, very good friend Amanda. I've known this girl since second grade. This is how we met: I tortured her. I'm not even kidding. For some reason she kept me around though (?). She's also the woman who coined the phrase, "you think you're special? WELL! I can stick my tongue to my nose!". She fails to tell you this is a major feat because everything else on her body is so ultra tiny. Minus those ta-tas. She has some huge ta-tas. (bitch) But in all seriousness, Manda, you're a shortcake... and I still love you.

And this is what she looks like normally:

OK, maybe not, but it's still funny.

Here's are some Amanda-isms for you:

Amanda: "I travel a lot, but I'm definitely anti visiting third world countries"

Me: "I could see why"

Amanda: "In fact I think I discriminate against second world countries too"

This is what Amanda says when I answer her phone calls:

Amanda: "God? God? What the shit? no! it's me Morty!"

This is what she said last night:

Amanda: "Are these pictures going on your blog?" <--- Oh yes, yes they are!

So Amanda came over last night just in time for our lasagna feast. She loved it! Also, whenever Andrew and I play one of those video games at a bar we always opt to call our winning selves AK47. Why? Andrew, Kelly... we're just so clever like that. So we will call this "Lasagna AK47 Style"

*Please note I don't advocate the use of guns, irony is just too much fun though. Ask the British.

Lasagna AK47 Style

Ingredients:
1 Lb. Ground Beef
1 Lb. Hot Sausage
2 24 oz. Jars of Sauce (Your choice, I dig Classico Spicy Tomato and Basil)
1 16 oz. Package of Lasagna (none of that no-boil crap)
1 4-Cup Package of Shredded Mozzarella Cheese
1 24 oz. Ricotta Cheese
1/4 Grated Parmesan Cheese
4 Eggs
Salt (To Taste)
Pepper (To Taste)
Garlic Powder (To Taste)
Onion Powder (To Taste)
Worcestershire Sauce (To Taste)

You Will Need:
A Large Casserole Dish.
A Large Boiling Pot
A Large Sauce Pan
A Medium Sized Frying Pan
Colander
Wax Paper or Aluminum Foil
Aluminum Foil

Steps:

1.) No matter what they say, cook the Lasagna first. Bring a Large Pot of water to a boil and slowly add pieces of Lasagna. Boil for about 10 minutes.

2.) In the meantime, lay out some Wax Paper or Aluminum Foil and put the Jars of Pasta Sauce in the Large Sauce Pan on low heat.

3.) Once the Lasagna is cooked, rinse the Lasagna with cold water in a colander.

4.) Lay the individual pieces of Lasagna out on the Wax Paper or Aluminum Foil to dry and don't let them stick together!

5.) Take a sip of wine and preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

6.) Refill that same Large Pot with water and bring to a boil. Add the Hot Sausage and cook for about 5 minutes. Once done, set aside.

7.) In the meantime, put the Ground Beef in the Frying Pan with the Garlic Powder, Onion Powder, Worcestershire Sauce and Salt and Pepper and cook until you can't see anymore pink.

8.) Mix the Ricotta Cheese, 2 cups of Mozzarella Cheese, the Parmesan Cheese, the Eggs and the Salt and Pepper to make your Cheese Filler. Set aside.

9.) Without draining the Frying Pan, add the cooked Ground Beef to the Sauce which is already simmering on the stove.

10.) Add the partially cooked/boiled Hot Sausage to the Frying Pan (making sure to keep the Ground Beef fat) and fry the Hot Sausage until it's no longer pink.

11.) Add the Hot Sausage to the Sauce (which is already simmering on the stove, in case I haven't said that enough).

12.) Take the Casserole Dish and splash on a layer of Sauce, followed by a layer of Lasagna, followed by a layer of Cheese Filler. Repeat that same move two more times. When you add the last layer of Cheese Filler, add one more layer of Lasagna, followed by one last layer of Sauce.

13.) Cover that whole yummy Lasagna with Mozzarella Cheese and some Parmesan Cheese.

14.) Cover the Casserole Dish with Aluminum Foil and bake for 30 minutes. Uncover and put on broil for an additional 3-5 minutes.

15.) Take another sip/glass of wine, give yourself a pat on the back and enjoy! Bon Appetit!

Eat Your Heart Out

Once upon a time, in a land about 2 hours away, there was a young college girl who lived off of cheeseburger hot dogs, barbecue chips and iced tea. She had no idea how to cook beyond the basic skills. Luckily for her, she had a much, much older sister who came along to rescue her and sent her an array of easy recipes. These recipes were quick and delicious.

The young girl broke free of her chains and learned how to make mashed potatoes and grilled chicken and a variety of other yummy trays to appease the taste buds and the metabolism. She would never tell her sister this, but it was thanks to her that the young girl learned to stay away from all things hot dog and chip related. However, sometimes it's ok to be bad (as long as it doesn't come in a package). There are two such recipes that I would like to share with you today that fall in that naughty category.

These recipes come from my sister who inherited them from her in-laws. Once you make them you'll know, oh you'll know. I think the recipe for Pepperoni & Mushroom Dip is the actual reason my Boyfriend fell in love with me me (no joke).

Pepperoni & Mushroom Dip

Ingredients:

2 Blocks of Philadelphia Cream Cheese

1 Can Cream of Mushroom Soup

1 Stick of Pepperoni

6-8 Bagels (Plain, Onion or a Variety if so desired)

You'll Need:

A Medium Sized Casserole Dish (go disposable if you're traveling)

Directions:

1. Set the oven to 350 degrees

2. Slice the Pepperoni and quarter each slice

3. In the casserole dish add the Cream Cheese, Cream of Mushroom Soup and and the Diced Pepperoni (no need to attempt to mix it, it will melt together while it cooks)

4. Place in the oven and bake for 30 minutes (stir about every 10 minutes)

5. In the meantime, take the bagels and slice them in half and cut each slice into eighths.

Special Note: If you are bringing this dip to a party/gathering/bash, follow steps 1-5 and upon arrival at your destination heat their oven to 350 degrees and bake for an additional 20 minutes

Buffalo Chicken Dip

Ingredients:

2 Blocks of Philadelphia Cream Cheese

1 Can of Chicken. Drained (you'll find this near the tuna and it looks exactly like tuna in a can)

1/2 Cup of Ranch Dressing

1/2 Cup Shredded Mozzarella Cheese

1/4-1/2 Cup Buffalo Sauce (to taste)

1 Bag of Frito's Scoops

You'll Need:

A Medium Sized Casserole Dish (go disposable if you're traveling)

Directions:

1. Heat the oven to 350 degrees

2. Combine the Cream Cheese, Chicken, Ranch Dressing, Mozzarella Cheese, and Buffalo Sauce (remember the Buffalo Sauce is your preference, you can make it as hot or mild as you want)

3. Place in the oven and bake for 30 minutes (stir about every 10 minutes)

4. Lay out the Frito's in a dish for dipping.

Special Note: If you are bringing this dip to a party/gathering/bash, follow steps 1-4 and upon arrival at your destination heat their oven to 350 degrees and bake for an additional 20 minutes.

This Is A Test, This Is Only A Test

Due to the recent outbreak of the Swine Flu, and the ensuing panic that followed, my company has opted to close the office tomorrow for a drill (this is a test of the emergency broad cast system, this is a test, this is ONLY a test). So how does this work? Well, everyone will be working from home tomorrow.

What's the point? Our IT department is going to analyze how well we all function at home tomorrow. Why? Oh, in the event that the Swine Flu outbreak becomes a pandemic and the company is forced to shut down the office. Alright, I'm kind of excited. This means I get to WORK FROM HOME. I will never do my hair again, I'm so on board!

Oh and while I'm at it I'm going to take a stab at cooking with a Crock Pot for the first time by making Ham and Cabbage. For someone who cooks as much as I do, I'm surprised I haven't delved into the realm of slowcookers. But alas, I found this recipe in my grandmom's cook book and I'm going to test (ah ha, test) it out tomorrow while I sit on my ass in my PJs, watching reruns and working via CDMA. Mm Hmm...

I'll keep you posted on how it goes, but in the meantime here's the recipe:

Ingredients:
1 Smoked Ham, cut into chunks
4 Medium Potatoes, sliced and cut into chunks
6 Carrots, pared and halved
1 Cabbage Head, cut into wedges
1/4 Cup Light Brown Sugar
2 Tbsp. Mustard
2 Tbsp. Horseradish
1/4 Cup Apple Juice
1/4 Cup Chicken Stock

Recipe:
Now for the easy part! Apparently, all you have to do is;
1. Coat the Ham with the Brown Sugar, Mustard and Horseradish.
2. Add all the ingredients into the slowcooker.
3. Cover and cook for 6-8 hours.

On The Brink

So after months of careful consideration on the Boyfriend's part and constant nagging on my part about my desire for "dinner parties" and "barbecues" we have finally decided to take the plunge, call a realtor and buy a house. Eek! It all seemed well and good until I realized that this will forever change my life. There will be no more frivolous days of me dreaming of running away to Europe or of going back to school and living at my parent's shore house or... oh I don't know, say... falling in love with a British trust fund baby and sailing around the Mediterranean (a girl can dream!)

As nervous as I am... I really am excited. I can't wait to sign my life away to a piece of property. Hell, at least it's better than signing my life away to say... collagen? breast implants? I've been dreaming about this for a long time... the day I walk in to MY house and look at MY yard and yell at MY hot water heater for breaking in the middle of winter... you know all those FUN issues ;-) Plus I couldn't imagine a better man to buy a house with than one who can re-tile my bathroom AND put up dry wall. Mm hmm... I hit the jackpot.

So, we're looking for houses in the Abington/Ambler/Plymouth Meeting/Lafayette Hill/North Wales area... and I'll keep you posted on our decision, if we make one... since we are two of the most indecisive people on the planet...

On a separate note,

The Boyfriend and I have been on this super health kick lately. Yesterday after our ass kicking work out at LA Fitness we decided to go to the grocery store. Now, I HIGHLY recommend going grocery shopping after you work out because it will make you pick your choices very carefully. You'll pick up a bag of chips, read the calorie content and go "oh, hellll no, not in this lifetime". THIS should be the new form of dieting! Fuck Atkins. I worked way too hard to burn those 350 calories, eh eh.

While at the grocery store analyzing the nutritional content of a box of Wheat Thins, the Boyfriend discovered that veal burgers are half the calories and half the fat! That's wicked. So go eat a veal burger, top it with some tomatoes and lettuce and feel good about yourself because you just cut your meal in half which means you can drink that next glass of wine GUILT FREE!

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I had a funny premise to this recipe written up all nicely in my new, leather notebook (let me focus on that word- NEW). But then! the phone rang... which I answered... at the same exact time that I twisted my chair around to locate the culprit who was insidiously tapping on my cube. A small conversation ensued and I briefly forgot that the phone (with the person going "Hello? Hello?") was in my hand.

Well, I also failed to realize that my phone cord had wrapped itself around my coffee cup. SO! when I turned back to speak to the person on the phone, I turned just in time to spill my coffee all over myself, my NEW notebook, my phone and every post-it from here to Alabama. FABULOUS. I guess I'm having one of those days... and that bastard at philly.com who writes my horoscope gave me 5 stars today!!! Liar.

Now I smell, I reek of coffee... and not in that "oooo yum, that smells fabulous way" no, in a "has anyone cleaned the coffee pot this week?" kind of way.

More than anything, I really, really wanted to post the recipe for Cabbage Rolls because it is one of me and my Boyfriend's absolute favorites. IMPORTANT NOTE: don't forget the sour cream!

Stuffed Cabbage:

1 1/4 pound Meatloaf Mix (you can use ground beef or ground turkey or whatever you have that is ground)

1 Cabbage (leaves pulled off, separated and washed)

1 1/4 Cups Milk

1/2 Cup Rice

1 Cup Milk

Worcestershire Sauce (To Taste)

Salt (To Taste)

Pepper (To Taste)

Brown Sugar (To Taste)

1/2 Cup Water

Olive Oil

Sour Cream

You Will Need:

a Large Pot

Medium Frying Pan

a Casserole Dish

Directions:

1. Bring a large pot of water, with salt, to a boil. Once it begins boiling, begin adding the Cabbage Leaves making sure to submerge them completely.

2. In the meantime, heat 1 1/4 Cups Milk over Medium Low heat, add the rice and cook, stirring frequently, until fluffy and not crunchy.

3. Once the rice is done cooking, combine the Meatloaf Mix, 1 Cup of Milk, Worcestershire Sauce, Salt, Pepper, and the Rice.

4. Take a sip of wine, you have a wait and it might get complicated.

5. Once the cabbage leaves can be poked with a fork, but aren't falling apart begin to take them out. You'll see that they may not all fit in the pot so it will become a process. Allow them to drain on a towel or paper towel and cool.

6. Once all your leaves are cool and ready to go, take each leave and spread it out. Add a handful of the Meat/Rice Mixture to the middle of each leaf and roll it up.

7. Once you've rolled all the leaves up and packed them with meat, take a sip of wine, pat yourself on the back, heat some olive oil in a frying pan over Medium High heat and turn the oven to 350 degrees.

8. Add the Cabbage Rolls to the olive oil and allow them to slightly brown on both sides.

9. Once the Cabbage Rolls have been browned, spread them out in the Casserole Dish. Add enough water to cover about 1/8 of each Cabbage Roll. Sprinkle with brown sugar, cover and place in the oven for about an hour and a half.

10. Grab the sour cream (this is a condiment), get some wine, sit down and enjoy.

Sidenote: Once the Cabbage Rolls are cooked, you have the option to add red sauce (or better yet you can cook them in red sauce) I don't eat them this way.... but if you're curious, let me know and I'll help you out!

Please Allow Me To Introduce You...

To My Dear Friend: Anthony

Anthony and I met in ninth grade. You know... that awful year where you're overcome with raging hormones and acne. My memory skills aren't that fabulous so I won't pretend as though I remember everything, but Anthony has a MUCH better memory than me (one of the many reason I keep him around) Sincerely though, I adore this guy. I've known him since he was riding around on his skateboard listening to Lagwagon and Blink 182 while attempting to charm the ladies with his knowledge of computers and video games. He's been making me laugh for 11 years (that makes me feel old). But aside, I saw him on Saturday and these are a few Anthony-isms for you:

Anthony: Ms. MacCord, the first time I met you, you walked up to me and went "Did you fart?". As if 9th grade wasn't hard enough.

Anthony: Your 16th birthday, I remember, I showed up in a suit and you whistled at me across the room. You whistled at me! It was the highlight of my life. Up until that point I thought I had no game, but then I was like "Oh, well if Kelly whistled at me, then I MUST be awesome". If it weren't for you my self-esteem may have shattered right then and there.

Anthony: I'm in love with Megan Fox. I would do unforgivable things to her. UNFORGIVABLE things, Kelly!
Me: What does that mean?
Anthony: Unforgivable!

Aside, the reason I bring this up is because my friend Anthony, aka Pizon, is a PICKY eater. When I say this, you have NO idea... its like feeding a 3 year old. There can be no condiments, no spices, no nothing! I tell myself this is preparation in case I end up with a child who is a picky eater. So I devised this recipe in honor of him and I call it; the Anthony. (The goal of this recipe is to hide the condiments IN the burger)

The Anthony (Burger Sandwich with Butter Noodles) Serves 5

Burger Sandwich:
1 1/2 Pounds Hamburger Meat (I prefer 80/20 for burgers)
1 Tablespoon Worcestershire Sauce (or To Taste)
2 Teaspoons Garlic Salt (or To Taste)
1 Egg
1 Tablespoon of Plain Breadcrumbs
1 Tablespoon Ketchup (or To Taste)
1 Tablespoon Mayonnaise
5 Kaiser Rolls
1 Thinly Sliced Tomato
Lettuce

Butter Noodles:
1 Box of Farfalle Noodles
2 Tablespoons Butter
Salt and Pepper (To Taste)
Dash of Olive Oil

1.) Bring a medium size pot of water to a boil at Medium High heat, add salt and a dash of olive oil.
2.) Combine the Hamburger Meat, Worcestershire Sauce, Garlic Salt, Ketchup, Mayonnaise, Egg and Breadcrumbs. Once well combined; break up and roll into individual burgers.
3.) Add the noodles to the boiling pot of water.
4.) Cook the burgers to the desired inside temperature (I use a George Foreman grill, but a non-stick, non-greased skillet will work as well)
5.) Once the noodles are done, combine with butter, salt and pepper
6.) Place the burgers on the buns and top with lettuce and tomato

Now here is the tricky part, serve it to him and hope he doesn't notice that there's flavor in it. Heart points to you, Link, if you complete your quest. (I had to make a Zelda reference- that was for Pizon :-)

Mama Said There'd Be Days Like These...

So today is one of those days where I'd much rather be curled up in my bathtub with a glass of wine, a good book and and a cigarette tightly tucked into a diamond covered cigarette holder (a girl can dream). But one of my favorite things for girly days is BRIE, love it, love it, can't get enough of it. I found this recipe a while back and I highly recommend it.

Apricot Brie Bake

Ingredients:

Jar of Apricot Jelly
A roll of Pillsbury Crescent Rolls
A circle of Brie (I highly recommend Genuardi's Primo Taglio, but alas... Joan of Arc is good as well)
4 apples
Grapes
2 boxes of crackers (veggie crackers are the best)

You will need:
A pie dish

Instructions:
1.) Go to the liquor store, you will need a bottle of red wine, oh and heat the oven to 350
2.) Crack open the Crescent Roll cover and unroll all the Crescents Rolls making sure to separate all the funky triangles
3.) Lay down 3-4 Crescent Triangles on the bottom of the pie dish, leaving room to cover the edges of the brie from underneath
4.) Take the brie and lather it with the Apricot Jelly (envision that the Brie is Johnny Depp and the jelly is... well, that's up your own imagination)
5.) Lay the Lathered Brie down on the Crescent Triangles in the pie dish.
6.) Cover the Lathered Brie with 2-3 more Crescent Triangles
7.) Pull the Crescent Triangles from underneath to fill the seams
8.) Lightly spread a thin layer of Apricot Jelly on the now cozy Brie and then place in the oven
9.) Cut the apples up, pull the crackers out, arrange as needed
10.) Once the Crescent rolls brown and you can stick a knife through and have it covered with mushy yummy Brie, you can pull it out of the oven. Dip your apples or crackers in, drink some red wine and enjoy.

Note: This was one of my favorites before I went to parties or had a live in bf, so if you're on your own and are craving this yummy treat, just take one crescent roll and wrap it around a chunk of brie... make sure to LATHER it up baby ;-)

Don't Even Ask Me To Bake

Last night was one of those nights where the boy had to work late. Now nights like these make me uber happy, so happy that I even had the bubbly urge to stop at the neighbors "produce stand" and pick up some greenery (since greenery is good for you and all). Four peppers later, I was on my way home with stuffed peppers on my mind and a hard on for some cheesy, greasy, ricey goodness.

So there I am, a glass of red wine in one hand, a bottle of Worcestershire in the other and I'm stoked; stoked that the kitchen is all MINE and stoked that I'm doing something nice (me? nice? We'll need proof of that m'am...) Well, Boyfriend comes in and lights up. You would have thought that he came in to find me laying around in a Princess Leia costume, calling him Jabba and asking that he spank me repeatedly with a stick of sausage. But no... alas, that's not where this story is headed.

We sit down for dinner:

Me: "Aren't you a lucky man? You come home from a hard day of work and you get to sit down to a fabulously prepared meal"

Boyfriend: "I know, its wonderful! You know... when we first started dating you used to cook dinner for me almost every night"

Me: "....THAT is because I was competing with your mother...."


My Recipe for Stuffed Peppers:

Ingredients:
4 Peppers
1-1 1/2 Pounds Ground Beef (I prefer 80/20, but to each their own)
1/2 of a Large Yellow Onion (finely chopped)
2 Cloves Fresh Garlic (finely chopped)
1 Can Diced Tomatoes
1/2 Cup Rice (not instant: must be the hardcore do-it-yourself kind)
1/2 Cup Water
Shredded Cheddar Cheese
Worcestershire Sauce (To Taste)
Salt (To Taste)
Pepper (To Taste)

1. Cut the heads off the peppers and remove the guts. Place peppers in a pot of boiling water (Note: to make this easier on yourself make sure that as much of the peppers are submerged as possible)

2. In a medium frying pan (must have a lid! don't get caught lidless), combine the Ground Beef, Onion, Garlic and Worcestershire Sauce.

3. Once the meat is browned and smells yummy, take off the burner, drain some of the grease (not all) and add the Diced Tomatoes, Rice, Water and more Worcestershire sauce.
Important Note: Make sure that all the rice is submerged in the liquid, you don't want to have crunchy rice stuck in your pepper or no one will like you)

4. Place the Meat/Rice Concoction back on the burner and bring to a boil. Once you reach a boil, turn the temperature down to Low, cover and leave alone.

5. You get a break now, go have a glass of wine and make sure you pre-heat the oven to 350.

6. Once the peppers can be pierced with a fork, but aren't too mushy, remove them from the pot and place in a casserole dish or on a cookie sheet or on tin foil (if you're desperate).

7. Sprinkle the inside of the peppers with salt and pepper.

8. During this time, you should check the Meat/Rice Concoction. By now, the rice should be fluffy, delicious and there shouldn't be much (if any) liquid left over. If the rice is crunchy, add more water and allow to simmer longer. If there is too much water, drain and simmer. If all is well, remove and combine the Meat/Rice Concoction with a half cup of Cheddar Cheese (you can add more cheese if you like, I do!)

9. Scoop the Meat/Rice Concoction into the peppers. Top off the peppers with more cheese and place in the oven. In about 15 minutes or until cheese is melted, remove the peppers and allow to cool.

1o. Eat, Enjoy, Have More Wine and/or Funny Conversations with your Boyfriend/Girlfriend/Lover/F*ck Buddy, etc..